My Mom, the Brickhouse

My dad and I had a talk on Friday morning. I asked him how did he and my mom meet? He said that she used to walk me and my sis to school every morning and he used to see her. He said that she was a brickhouse. All throughout my childhood I heard how pretty my mom was. Not just how pretty, but I would hear, "your mama is a pretty black woman." There would be emphasis on the word BLACK like women with her skin color wasn't supposed to be pretty. My mom had really dark skin, but she was beautiful. She wasn't just beautiful, she was "stacked"

My dad was a nice looking guy also. I had to hear women talk about fine he was. I guess together, they were a good looking couple.

Finally after a while of him trying to get her attention, she gave him her number. Not long after they were married.

My dad said that he believes that the only reason they were married was because my mom wanted to prove her mom that she could get married.

This was a story I heard from her, so he confirms what she said.

Basically, my mom was a teen parent. She had just turned 17. A year later my sister came. My grandmother was not happy. As a matter of fact my mother became the black sheep because she shamed the family's name.

Because she was so ostracized and often told that no man would ever want her she set out to prove that she could "get a man." The problem was that the man she got wasn't the best. My dad was an alcoholic, he did drugs, and he didn't mind being with other women. Our life was horrible and with time more and more children came until there were 7 of us.

Actually, my dad has 8 children plus 2 step children, so there are 10 of us. He hasn't taken care of any of us growing up.

Whenever, he would get a job, I'd know when payday was because that would be the day when he wouldn't come home. He'd disappear for weeks at a time.

My mom, despite how smart she was--she had a scholarship to go to college, but couldn't go because she was 17 when she graduated high school and needed her mom's signature which was not gonna happen--she had low self-esteem.

How else do you explain putting up with a man who couldn't care for you and your children? My mom did what she could to keep the family afloat, but we were homeless twice growing up. We've also spend quite a few times with no electricity and water in the house because she couldn't pay the bills.