Craziest Dreams

The last two days I've had the craziest, disturbing dreams. The first dream, I was with Mister and we were having sex, but for some reason I had a really hairy booty and the smell was awful. I mean, it smelled like I hadn't washed in days. It was the grossest thing. Not only was my butt extremely hairy, but I had ingrown hairs that has turned into big bumps with puss oozing out. It was the grossest thing.  Why in the world would I have a dream like that. The smell was so bad, I thought it was real. I had to check myself. LOL

Then last night I had a dream that I was kidnapped by this girl that I know and her sister and I think Mister left me or something like that. I tried to call 911, but they turned off the phones and they were laughing at me because I was trying to escape. I started pleading the blood of Jesus and the one girl just looked at me. Then they got out the smallest pocket knives to cut me and I was wrestling with them to get the knives away from them. The knives were so small I kept wondering if they were trying to kill me or just torture me because they could not do any damage with those knives. Somehow I escaped. But, Mister was in this dream too and I kept wondering why he left me.

Interesting!!!

For Where I'm going....Why I'm not Married

I've prayed (very seldomly) to get married. I thought it would happen last year, but it didn't. And I think I know why.

I'm in transition.

Well, I have been in transition and is coming out. I have transformed from being one person into being a new person and I think God. My mind is being renewed and I am becoming a new creature in Christ. Had I gotten married last year of the years prior, it would have been a mistake. I would have married someone who fit the old me, not the new me.

Mister told me something that was simple, yet powerful and even though he was specifically talking about the two of us, it was a warning so to speak. He said, "we have grown in very different ways" and that is so true in life. People get together and somethings the marriage or relationship doesn't work out because they grow apart instead of together. Had I gotten married we would have grown apart. I would have been in one place and he would have been in another place. That's the same thing with Coach. We are in two totally different hemisperes and when two people are that far apart, there great difficulties getting along.

So, because of my transformation, I need to attract someone who is for me, who will compliment my future. I'm not the old me and I'm still not where I want to be so the new person has to be in an advanced state, not behind me, so to speak. If he is going to be the head, he has to be ahead of me. WOW!!

There have been so many guys that I've dated that has not been "my head." We either had power struggles because I was the head (or trying to be) or he was content to let me lead which is out of order.

So, this year, I will meet the man who is my head.

Thank God for my head!!

My New Treadmill

I'm so exited. I have a new treadmill. Actually, it's not new, I got it on craiglist for $75 and I paid $45 for a guy to move it. It's a proform foldable treadmill. It's nice and sturdy. I cleaned it up because it was in a person's garage. I'm going to get some lubricant and I'm going to dust it out. I'm also going to build a desk to go over the top of it when I get paid. I can't wait. I got on it this morning and did some work, emailing, and I enjoyed it. I also signed up for a weight loss study at Stanford University, but I think I can't enroll because I don't live in Cali and the study says that I have to meet with them once a week which I can't do. I wish I could because I enjoy research and I want to lose some weight.

It's On It's Way

I can feel it. What God has for me is on it's way. I can see it. It's on it's way!! Praise God!!!! AND I'M READY!!!!

I just have to be patient and not get ahead of God!!

I Lost It

I have been regular for the past year. I mean clock work regular. Every 10th of the month Aunt Flo was here. Well, sometimes it was on the 11th or 12th, but never before or after. For a whole year. Actually for the first time in my life I have been regular like this. But, July 10th came and went. Then the 11th and the 12th came and went. And nothing. No period. Yes, I got the the crampiness, and the tender breast, but Aunt Flo was far from me. I have no ideal why. Well, actually I do....

If I was in a relationship right now I would be worried, but I have not had relations since July 2012, so that's not the problem.

I think it's due to being overworked. I have been so tired from work and volunteering and there have been times when I haven't gone to sleep until 2am and waking up at 6am...the other day carbon monoxide was leaking in the building so the building had to be evacuated at 4am. Yea, my body is tired, so I think Aunt Flo went on vacation cause my body has been wore out.

I hope she comes back soon. We'll see about August.

Foster Mom

I want to become a foster mom. It's actually something that I've been wanting to do for a long time. Well, I've always said that I wanted to adopt and now that I'm a little more comfortable, I think I wanna do it. I know it's a long arduous process, about a yearlong process, but I think in January I'll start the process. I actually started the process about 10 years ago, but I never completed it. But, I think in January I'm going to go for it!!!

I can't wait to start the journey.

$550

Interest sucks. Whoever came up with charging interest on loans was a genius because its a money maker. I had about $650 left to pay on my car loan. I paid $350, so my goal was to pay $150 in the next two pay periods to have it paid, but somehow over the last two weeks the balance has become $550. I understand I was charged a late fee, but $250 in fees.....WOW!!!

I'm not even gonna investigate it. I know I was late and behind. As a matter of fact I'm 4 months behind, but dag.

I want to pay about $200 from my next pay check so that I can get this taken care of ASAP!!!

Exhausting Summer

I thank God for my job. I have been learning so much. I've been background checked, tested, commissioned and background checked again......and my training is still going on. I think I will fully be able to do my work by the end of this month.

The work is not difficult, but there is a lot of information that goes into what we need to do. I've been operating without a computer so it's difficult to do my job. I have to have the internet, so thank God for my office at church. I can use the computer there. Or in the media center at church.

I've been looking for a treadmill and a desk top computer because I can not sit and do all this work. I'm already going driving a lot, so I don't want to sit at home too.

In other news....

Mister's phone is cut off, so we haven't been talking at all. I'm not mad about that. I started me debt relief program this month since I am getting a regular paycheck every two weeks. So, I'm looking at being cheap. I haven't even bought gas for my car. LOL.

I want to take the next two years to GET OUT OF DEBT!!!

In other news....

I signed up for the American Cancer Society long term study today. I'm happy about that. It's a 20-30 year study where they send me a survey to fill out every two years.

We have a summer camp going on at church. I've been volunteering at and we also had VBS where I volunteered for three days. Man, that was exhausting.