Hustle Man

I was a little sad a couple days ago, but instead of blog about my dire situation I simply declared that I would have a GREAT Christmas and God is good because I had just that--this was the best Christmas I've had in years.

Initially I thought I was going to be broke. I had about $50 in the bank and my plan was to go out of town to see my sis in Ohio, but that wasn't enough money to do that so I was content to be at home--alone.

Imagine my surprise when I went to work on Tuesday morning and I went to the bank to deposit my petty cash check and there was over $2000 in the bank.

WE GOT PAID EARLY!!

Instead of getting paid on the 26th, we got paid on the 23rd.

I called my brother and my plan was to go home to see my mom and clean her house for Christmas, but he brought up Ohio, so that was the plan. I booked and train ticket, finished work and off I went.

I love taking the train--its cheap, roomy and I can sit and relax. Whenever I take the train home I usually take the metro link to my mom's and they pick me up from there. This time was no different. I got off the train, headed for the metro link which is right outside the train station and I proceeded to buy my ticked. I pushed the button and nothing.

There was a group of boys hanging out by the ticket machines. One called over to me, "Hey, I got a ticket for $2." That was .50 less than buying one from the machine. "Is it validated?" I asked as he was walking towards me. He showed me the ticket which as not a ticket at all--it was a transfer that can be used as a ticket. I looked at it and he was pointing out that I could use it all day. Then I looked at the date IN RED LETTERS, "December 11, 2014."

I looked at him and said, "It says December 11. Today is NOT the 11th." He just looked at me. I asked him if he needed $2 because he was trying to hustle me. He say he did. I told him I'd give him $2 and I did.

I left him and walked past security. I have no idea what they were securing, but after that I started praying. I comtemplated telling them, but I didn't want any of the boys to follow me onto the train, so I didnt' say anything.

I made it home and stayed the night at my moms and headed to Ohio on Christmas Eve where we stopped in Indy to have a late dinner with Mister.

Wonderful Christmas

I AM GOING TO HAVE THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!!

AMEN!!

What the What?

I had a dream that I needed to get some copies of a form that a friend of mine was using at her job. We will call the place The Tradition Center. This is a place that serves individuals with mental health and substance abuse issues. And the instead of me recreating a form, I just wanted to use one that they already created. I called me friend, who used to work there, and she said for me to just go pick it up--that Larry would have it ready for me. When I got there, I needed to make copies and for some reason when I made copies, I copied an entire packet of blank forms, but I only needed one. So I was getting ready to leave with all these forms when other staff came in and I decided that I needed this one form to be sent to me on my email that way it would be easier to recreate on my own and the person got me a computer and I emailed myself the form--so I thought. After emailing it one of the staff person got an email and she opened it and it was me emailing from Larry, not to myself, but to the entire staff body. And I didn't email just one form, but an entire case file of one of his clients.

WHAT????

The other staff person said that the email was tricky. You had to click a button before you sent anything to uncheck the "send to all" button, but I didn't know that because this was some new type of email.

OMG!!

So, I kept asking if I could "undo" like in gmail.

NOPE!!

So were were scrambling trying to figure out what to do and one by one, people started opening the email that contained this confidential file.  The bad part was that I emailed it from Larry, so it looked like Larry emailed the entire staff a confidential file and Larry had no clue. I tried to retract it by sending another file to everyone saying to delete it, but no luck.  And the staff people weren't trying to help me. I was going to get my friend in trouble because she was the one who told me to get the form from Larry.

Then I woke up.

Now, the problem with this dream is that my friend doesn't work at this place anymore and Larry is dead. Yep, dead as a door knob. He retired and then died of a heart attack. Poor Larry (not his real name).

It was a strange dream.

Then I went back to sleep and I had a dream where I was with a group of young people and I was teaching them how to pray by listening to other people pray. I had them in a group and I was telling them to listen to a cd of praying while they prayed and as more and more youth came in, I would give them the cd and some had mp3 players, so I would download it onto the mp3 so they could pray with the cd. Then the room got really crowded and I because they were youth, they kept coming and going and I was telling them that if they needed to use the restroom they could sign to me (using ASL) the sign for restroom and I would give them permission since they needed to stop walking during pray. Then the room got so crowded that I was questioning if we should spread out to the hallways. Then I woke up.

Finish Strong

This year was a rollar coaster ride and it's almost over. But, I've got to FINISH STRONG.

I was a little bummed about not meeting someone special this year. It took me a minute to get over, but now I'm questioning God.

A couple months ago I met Carwash guy. It was late September. He was REALLY cute and for a few days I was just messed up thinking about him. and I hate that because I should not be desperate for a man. I DON'T want to be desperate for a man. So I never went back to see him.  But today, I came home from work and as my partner was taking me home we saw lights in the sky--kind of like seach lights that they use at clubs. So we decided to find out what was going on and we drove to where the lights were and it was an advertisement for the new Cricket wireless store in town. Bummer. LOL. But, as we were leaving the parking lot I spotted a pink tent just like the one Carwash Guy had and I told my partner I was going to come back and surely I did, but the tent was gone. Dang it. But then as I was getting gas I noticed a truck with the tent in the back and it was my guy, but it was some other guy and he told the gas station attendant that he would be back tomorrow.

So now I'm a little bothered because I see the tent and it reminds me of Carwash guy I want to try to see if I can find him. Dang, but is this the right thing to do?

I don't want to finish this year in a bad state. I gotta finish strong because that's how I will start next year. God help me, please!!!

Where Do I See Myself This Time Next Year

I need to make my goals for the next year and I've been praying because the only thing I REALLY want to do is THE WILL OF GOD!!

So my goals are:

1. Pray more
I need to pray 3 times a day--morning, noon (or around noon) and night

2. Study my Bible more
I need to study my Bible at least once per day

3. Become more personable
I need to speak to people more and be more loving

4. Operate out of humility
Always be mindful of pride and how it tried to creep into my heart

5. Get out of debt
Pay $1000 on my student loan each month

Always Something Going On

Everytime I see Coach, I should know....THERE IS SOMETHING GOING ON. I'm looking at the track record that we have. Every time we've seen each other, if I do a little digging, I find out that there is something going on.

I ran into him a few weeks ago and I was a little bothered, but grateful, that we spoke briefy and that was it. I was bothered because I was at Best Buy and I had just sprayed my dandruff riddled scalp with a tea tree oil spray. What you should know about tea tree oil is that it smells--not so good. It has this medicinal smell to it that I don't like, but I NEEDED to spray it on my scalp and I went to the store. Sure enough when he saw me he tried to talk to me and then came over. I think the smell of the tea tree oil turned him off which I am grateful for because I DID NOT want to be bothered.

Well, I just checked him out online and sure enough there was a divorce petition.

WHAT?????!!!!!

When did this happen?

The last time we was together it was summer 2014. I know it's been two years, but dag--married and divorced in two years. Dang.

His Name Should Be David

Usually when I dream, it means something. God usually is telling me something. Like in March when I had the dream about my cousin's baby.

Last night I had a dream that my sister, T, was holding a baby. It was a brown baby boy. And I believe it was her baby because she had gained weight. He was naked and she was just holding on to him. It was a beautiful scene. If this is God's way of showing me that my sister is going to have a baby (the doctors said she couldn't have children), then she should name him David because he's a warrior--he had a fight to get here.

If she is going to have a baby, I'll show her this post so that she can believe God.

Sometimes I have dreams because I've been watching stuff on TV. Like I was dreaming that someone was in my room and it was just because I had watched Castle before I went to bed.

The other day I had a dream and it was kind of funny, I was working at a gas station and an old friend from school walked in--D.S. And she looked at me like I was supposed to be working at the gas station and I didn't tell her that I had a fulltime, day job, and the gas station was just a parttime gig, but she kind of shook her head like I should've been a shamed to work there, but I wasn't because I knew the real deal. 

That has actually happened to me in real life--I worked at a gas station during the summer one time, because I was a teacher and I needed to work over the summer, but in August I was going back to teaching, the gas station was just a summer job and people would come in and recognize me like I was supposed to work there. I didn't say anything because it was just a parttime gig....

21 Days

There are 21 days until the end of this year. WOW!!!

I can't believe the years are going by so fast. I'm not ready for next year. This year has been UP and DOWN.

I was homeless again--living in my car.

How did that happen? WOW!!!

Now I have my own place and I thank God for a roof over my head. I NEVER want to go through homelessness again. EVER!! It's not something that is fun. I have made no headway in my debt snowball. I mean I do pay my student loan, but the payments are interest only. So, I need to pay a big chunk of it off and I'm working on doing that, but I have to pay tuition. And I just signed up for a winter class that I need to take and that tuition is about $1200. So, I have to pay about $3200 for tuition.

Spiritually, I was UP and then DOWN and I hate that, but God is still good and HE LOVES ME and I LOVE HIM!!

I was thrown off when I thought this year was going to be the year for me to be married...God forgive me. I was also thrown off when I met car wash man. I actually didn't meet him, but he was flirting with me (I think) and it got into my spirit and I allowed that to cause me to sin.

But, I'm making it through. Thank God and next year will be BETTER. Actually, these last 21 days will be BETTER!! And I thank God for my strength!!

I've been fasting a little because I need it. And starting Jan 1, the church will be ont he corporate fast. I need to decree some things for next year!!

ICK.....But I Used To Be The Same Way

I just drove an hour with two early twenty-something people in the back seat of my car with their hands all over each other.

Ick.....MAJOR ICK!!!

Backstory....

One of my former students needed a ride to a city 50 miles away to pick up his girlfriend from the train station. He asked. I agreed. We got there and picked his girlfriend up and they both got into the car...in the back seat. Ok. No problem at all until the smooching started.

Oh brother....

They smooched almost the whole way home and I didn't want to be a party pooper so I called the only person I felt comfortable calling....MISTER.

UGH!!!

And I told him about the smooching twenty somethings and he said the very thing that I was thinking...."That used to be you."

Yes, Yes, I know and I wish it was still me.

Dang it. I want a man to smooch. I haven't had a GOOD smooch in years.

I used to wonder how people got to this point. Now I know.

God, help me please, cause I need a good night sleep tonight!!!