I posted about one of the young people that I work with. And I was so bothered. I didn't know what to do. It was crazy. I decided to try to call him again to see what was going on and he answered. I was nervous, so I wasn't sure about asking for him.
"Is this *****," I asked sheepishly trying to convey confidence. I rehashed the story and he told me it was his grandfather.
WHEW!!!!
So relieved!!!!!
He said his mother unplugged the phone so that's why I couldn't get through. So, the other number that he had listed was his grandmother's and he is named after his grandfather. OMG!!!
I'm so relieve my stomach hurts. LOL. I was so concerned. I was trying to pray. That's too much stress!!
Wednesday, July 30, 2014
No, NO, and NNNNNOOOOOOOO!!
I just talked to one of my bosses and she needs me to work in the St. Clair county area. The same area where I'm from and the same area where "married man" is from. WHY, OH WHY???
I DO NOT want to see this man, but this is a temptation and I NEED God to help me!!!!!!!!!
God, I know you hear me when I pray. Help me with this one!! In Jesus Name, Amen.
Btw, I'm a little sad that I'm dealing with this. This is pathetic and not something that I should be dealing with. OMG!! What has gotten into me??
I DO NOT want to see this man, but this is a temptation and I NEED God to help me!!!!!!!!!
God, I know you hear me when I pray. Help me with this one!! In Jesus Name, Amen.
Btw, I'm a little sad that I'm dealing with this. This is pathetic and not something that I should be dealing with. OMG!! What has gotten into me??
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
All the Makings of Danger
I am absolutely not going to be in relationship with a married man. NOPE, not at all!!
It has all the makings of DANGER!!!!!
All types of bells and whistles going off!!! There is no need to keep going when you see the warning signs. So, I won't be going home this weekend. My other absolutes:
I WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT.....
1. Be friends with a married man.
2. Marry a man who doesn't love God.
3. Marry a man who is a drunkard
4. Marry a man who doesn't take care of his kids.
5. Not shack.
6. Not fornicate.
7.
8.
9.
My safeguards....
1. I will not hang out with a married man.
2. I will not text and inbox a married man.
3. I will not establish a relationship with a married man.
4.
5.
I need to have ASSETS in my life. Not LIABILITIES!!
To be continued......
It has all the makings of DANGER!!!!!
All types of bells and whistles going off!!! There is no need to keep going when you see the warning signs. So, I won't be going home this weekend. My other absolutes:
I WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT.....
1. Be friends with a married man.
2. Marry a man who doesn't love God.
3. Marry a man who is a drunkard
4. Marry a man who doesn't take care of his kids.
5. Not shack.
6. Not fornicate.
7.
8.
9.
My safeguards....
1. I will not hang out with a married man.
2. I will not text and inbox a married man.
3. I will not establish a relationship with a married man.
4.
5.
I need to have ASSETS in my life. Not LIABILITIES!!
To be continued......
Why, Married Men, Why??
I HATE facebook. Yep, just hate it. But sometimes I've got to use it. I get on to see how my fam doing and sometimes I'm looking up stuff for work. And while doing that I get caught up in seeing all the stuff people have on there. UGH!!! Then occassionally I get a message or two from someone that I DO NOT WANT to talk to. OMG.
So, this is what happened recently. I logged on and I get a message from a guy in high school. I respond to the friend request and message him back. BUT....before I message him back I check out his page. I see vacay pics with children and a woman, but his status doesn't say if he's married. I read a few post and one mentions his wife. Hmmmmm....what's the deal with that?!
So, he asked me if I ever get home and I tell him that I do. "So, that would be and opportunity to see you," is what he said in my response to coming home. I told him I would keep him posted.
WHY OH WHY???
So, now my mind is ....A seed is planted and surely my plan was to get home soon.
I make plans for this weekend and I let him know. We then get to talking about his life--two sons and wife. He then tells me that he liked me in high school.
Okay......????
He wanted to know why I didn't like him?
What??
That was high school....20 years ago?!!!
Why does that matter now? You have a wife and two sons. I barely remember high school, let alone why I didn't like someone. DAG!!
But, the little seed was planted and he's an attractive guy. BUT.....he's married.
Oh God!!!! What is wrong??
No, I've made plans to see him and I KNOW this is NOT good. Now I need a back out plan. Actually, I think I can still go home, but not see him alone. I can get my eyebrows done at his job. He's a barber and that will be safe?????
So, this is what happened recently. I logged on and I get a message from a guy in high school. I respond to the friend request and message him back. BUT....before I message him back I check out his page. I see vacay pics with children and a woman, but his status doesn't say if he's married. I read a few post and one mentions his wife. Hmmmmm....what's the deal with that?!
So, he asked me if I ever get home and I tell him that I do. "So, that would be and opportunity to see you," is what he said in my response to coming home. I told him I would keep him posted.
WHY OH WHY???
So, now my mind is ....A seed is planted and surely my plan was to get home soon.
I make plans for this weekend and I let him know. We then get to talking about his life--two sons and wife. He then tells me that he liked me in high school.
Okay......????
He wanted to know why I didn't like him?
What??
That was high school....20 years ago?!!!
Why does that matter now? You have a wife and two sons. I barely remember high school, let alone why I didn't like someone. DAG!!
But, the little seed was planted and he's an attractive guy. BUT.....he's married.
Oh God!!!! What is wrong??
No, I've made plans to see him and I KNOW this is NOT good. Now I need a back out plan. Actually, I think I can still go home, but not see him alone. I can get my eyebrows done at his job. He's a barber and that will be safe?????
Sunday, July 27, 2014
Hurting Heart
"Hello, this is T****** from ********. I'm trying to reach *******, I said to the woman answering the phone. I had called and called, but the answering machine had not picked up so I called ther emergency contact number.
I had just talked to ****** on Monday or was it Tuesday. I asked him if he was available to work with us on tomorrow. He said he was. He sounded happy and chipper. When I called him I expected to talk to the answering machine. I almost always talk to the answering machine. But no, he picked up and I told him I would call him back the next day to let him know that time. But, I didn't call him back the next day because my partner had not gotten back to me. So I called him back today, almost 5 days later.
"******** is dead," said the woman who answered the phone.
I was speechless. NEVER in a million years would I have expected that response.
At first I was thinking that maybe she was talking about his father. I mean father's die. They get old and they die. But not 16 year old kids.
"Hello," the woman said when I didn't respond.
I responded. I don't remember what I said.
"So take him off the list, said the woman."
I said "OK" and we hung up.
I wanted to say more. I wanted to ask who she was. I wanted to ask how, why? But, I was speechless. I felt like I had been punched or somehow the wind was knocked out of my.
What do you say when you call someone to work and you there that they are dead. I mean someone you know that you had just talked to.
I mean, I didn't know him well, but we had worked with him twice before and he was a quirky kid. Kind of goofy, but likeable. He asked me if he could use me as a reference. Of course he could. I had no problems with him.
So, dead is not what I expected to hear.
I was too shocked to know how to respond. So I went back to watch TV. But I was bothered. I couldn't watch TV. So I a back up. I mean I still have to work. I barely knew the kid. The backup wasn't available, so I called my partner to tell her. I left her a message. I'm glad her voicemail picked up. I was getting emotional and didn't want to cry. I mean, I"m an emotional person. I've been watching Oprah all day after church and I've been boohooing.
I went back to try to watch TV, but the spirit of what she said to me was trying to cover me. I mean, I hear that when some people are depressed, it's like wearing a coat of sadness. The depression wraps itself around them. This news, this bad news was attaching itself to me. So finally I prayed. "The blood of Jesus," is mostly what I prayed. I prayed for the family. Then I searched the internet. Usually when people die, there is something on facebook. Not sure why, but before the family can be informed sometimes, it's on facebook first. So I searched for him and couldn't find anything. Then I found his facebook page and nothing. No "RIP" messages.
Was this real?
I called one of my bosses. She had referred him to us. I left her a message. When she referred him she said she knew his sister. So surely, she could find out.
Now I'm here...processing because writing is the way I process. I tried to watch Martin. Tried to laugh, but I am so bothered. I texted all my loved ones to let them know that I love the. It's sad the only person who immediately responded was a nonrelative. WOW. Finally one of my sister's replied....
Life is short....
I had just talked to ****** on Monday or was it Tuesday. I asked him if he was available to work with us on tomorrow. He said he was. He sounded happy and chipper. When I called him I expected to talk to the answering machine. I almost always talk to the answering machine. But no, he picked up and I told him I would call him back the next day to let him know that time. But, I didn't call him back the next day because my partner had not gotten back to me. So I called him back today, almost 5 days later.
"******** is dead," said the woman who answered the phone.
I was speechless. NEVER in a million years would I have expected that response.
At first I was thinking that maybe she was talking about his father. I mean father's die. They get old and they die. But not 16 year old kids.
"Hello," the woman said when I didn't respond.
I responded. I don't remember what I said.
"So take him off the list, said the woman."
I said "OK" and we hung up.
I wanted to say more. I wanted to ask who she was. I wanted to ask how, why? But, I was speechless. I felt like I had been punched or somehow the wind was knocked out of my.
What do you say when you call someone to work and you there that they are dead. I mean someone you know that you had just talked to.
I mean, I didn't know him well, but we had worked with him twice before and he was a quirky kid. Kind of goofy, but likeable. He asked me if he could use me as a reference. Of course he could. I had no problems with him.
So, dead is not what I expected to hear.
I was too shocked to know how to respond. So I went back to watch TV. But I was bothered. I couldn't watch TV. So I a back up. I mean I still have to work. I barely knew the kid. The backup wasn't available, so I called my partner to tell her. I left her a message. I'm glad her voicemail picked up. I was getting emotional and didn't want to cry. I mean, I"m an emotional person. I've been watching Oprah all day after church and I've been boohooing.
I went back to try to watch TV, but the spirit of what she said to me was trying to cover me. I mean, I hear that when some people are depressed, it's like wearing a coat of sadness. The depression wraps itself around them. This news, this bad news was attaching itself to me. So finally I prayed. "The blood of Jesus," is mostly what I prayed. I prayed for the family. Then I searched the internet. Usually when people die, there is something on facebook. Not sure why, but before the family can be informed sometimes, it's on facebook first. So I searched for him and couldn't find anything. Then I found his facebook page and nothing. No "RIP" messages.
Was this real?
I called one of my bosses. She had referred him to us. I left her a message. When she referred him she said she knew his sister. So surely, she could find out.
Now I'm here...processing because writing is the way I process. I tried to watch Martin. Tried to laugh, but I am so bothered. I texted all my loved ones to let them know that I love the. It's sad the only person who immediately responded was a nonrelative. WOW. Finally one of my sister's replied....
Life is short....
Saturday, July 26, 2014
Thanks For the Visit
I'm always happy when Aunt Flo visits. It signifies that my body is working properly. I thin I missed her last month. Actually, I know I missed her last month. With the stress of moving and and not knowing where I was gonna live and what was going on in my life...she took a hiatus. So, when she shows up it lets me know that I'm not as stressed.
I've been looking and looking at homes. I haven't contacted the bank yet, but there are so many affordable homes. I can't wait until the 15th.
FPU tells me not to make any large purchases during the class, but I NEED a place to live ASAP. I love being able to live with my friend, but she doesn't want me there. It's becoming a burden. I don't have a key and she leaves her door unlocked and she's concerned about that and I live in a room. I can't have my stuff and I can't cook what I want. It's better than my other friend, but it's not home and not comfortable.
So, I pray and pray that the home loan goes through. I NEED it to go through!!
I have faith that it will and I'm not doubting. God is good like that.
I was reminded of the jacket that I bought. I searched and searched and I had a specific price in mind....
If God can do that, surely he can help me get a place to live.
I've been looking and looking at homes. I haven't contacted the bank yet, but there are so many affordable homes. I can't wait until the 15th.
FPU tells me not to make any large purchases during the class, but I NEED a place to live ASAP. I love being able to live with my friend, but she doesn't want me there. It's becoming a burden. I don't have a key and she leaves her door unlocked and she's concerned about that and I live in a room. I can't have my stuff and I can't cook what I want. It's better than my other friend, but it's not home and not comfortable.
So, I pray and pray that the home loan goes through. I NEED it to go through!!
I have faith that it will and I'm not doubting. God is good like that.
I was reminded of the jacket that I bought. I searched and searched and I had a specific price in mind....
If God can do that, surely he can help me get a place to live.
Friday, July 25, 2014
I AM SLEEPY
I do not wanna get sick again, but I NEED some sleep. I have been driving from pillar to post all around town, carting people around. I don't mind it, but it's getting to be a burden.
I Will Never Do That Again!
1. Talk bad about a person behind their back. It's just not right and I have no business talk about someone else.
2. Take the credit when it was clearly God who told me what to do.
3. Get lifted up in pride because I am such a flawed person. Nothing I do is right, but I can do all things through Christ....
4. Relive my past. It's over. I've LET IT GO!!
2. Take the credit when it was clearly God who told me what to do.
3. Get lifted up in pride because I am such a flawed person. Nothing I do is right, but I can do all things through Christ....
4. Relive my past. It's over. I've LET IT GO!!
Sunday, July 20, 2014
I Am Not Defeated
Any area in my life where I'm defeated, I have not allowed God to enter.
God has given me influence to get the job done in my life. I have to take that influence and show God's image in the earth. God did not create me to not have victory over every area in my life. I AM NOT DEFEATED!!
The devil can come and talk to me and make me feel like I don't have everything that I need. I am not made to fear because God didn't give me that spirit. So, I have the spirit of boldness on my life!! Everything God created it's already in me.
Just because I'm going through a situation, doesn't mean God is not with me. God is using this to get me to where I'm supposed to be.
After this battle, I'm still going to be standing!! My faith will get me through this. This faith that I have will get me through this!!
I have to allow my victory in God to surface and keep me afloat!
God has given me influence to get the job done in my life. I have to take that influence and show God's image in the earth. God did not create me to not have victory over every area in my life. I AM NOT DEFEATED!!
The devil can come and talk to me and make me feel like I don't have everything that I need. I am not made to fear because God didn't give me that spirit. So, I have the spirit of boldness on my life!! Everything God created it's already in me.
Just because I'm going through a situation, doesn't mean God is not with me. God is using this to get me to where I'm supposed to be.
After this battle, I'm still going to be standing!! My faith will get me through this. This faith that I have will get me through this!!
I have to allow my victory in God to surface and keep me afloat!
Friday, July 18, 2014
August 15
That is the deadline I'm giving myself to apply for another home loan. I've got a month. I want to pay off my interest for the student loan, but I needed to pay my dr bills from my broken toe and dental work. So I'm not sure where my credit score stands. I've checked various sites and everything gives me something different. I did sign up for Financial Peace University at my church and I'm excited to learn about money management.
I'm still telling everyone that I'm getting married this year.
I'm just doing what the word says, speak those things that be not as though they are.
God, I need you to help me!!
I'm still telling everyone that I'm getting married this year.
I'm just doing what the word says, speak those things that be not as though they are.
God, I need you to help me!!
Monday, July 14, 2014
I Don't Have a Shipping Address
I'm starting Financial Peace University at my church on next Monday. I'm online trying to sign up for class and they won't ship my materials to my P.O. Box. OMG. What am I going to do? I can ask my friend if they can ship it here to her place, but that's just pitiful. I NEED my OWN shipping address.
God, please hear me from heaven.
I would like to buy a home and/or get married this year. I NEED to get on with my life and I feel like I'm in this holding pattern and it's not fun at all.
God, please hear me from heaven.
I would like to buy a home and/or get married this year. I NEED to get on with my life and I feel like I'm in this holding pattern and it's not fun at all.
Friday, July 11, 2014
Why Oh Why??
I've been volunteering for Vacation Bible School for some years now and I really enjoy it. It reminds me of the summers at home when I was young and we spent our days at the church in Vacation Bible School. This is just who I am and what I do. I love the house of God.
Usually I help to plan the fun activities for the teens. But, this year there was a new team. And being apart of the new team I was given a lesson to teach. However, a few days before I was given the lesson, I was thinking about the theme which was, "The Connection," and God spoke to me about the prodigal son so I began to study the prodigal son. And I came up with a lesson and my two main points were that the reason to stay connected to Christ is to fulfill the purpose of God and to get what God has promised.
So, I had my lesson all planned before our first meeting two weeks ago. We met, got everything together and the week of Vacation Bible School I got sick. I caught the flu. I wasn't sure if I was gonna make it to VBS. As the week went on, I began to feel better, but the night before I was supposed to teach on Friday, I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned all night. I had to take the day off to sleep all day because I was so tired and being sick on top of it all, didn't help.
Well, I got to church and I couldn't print my notes. But, I wasn't going to let it get to me, I just went to another computer. I got all of my notes printed and off to my lesson I went. I think the teaching went well, but I was a little bothered. At the end of the teaching, it was quiet. Too quiet. I almost didn't know what to do. I'm not sure if they even understood everything and at the end, I meant to have them get together and teach their own lesson of what they learned, but I didn't. So, I went to Bible trivia, which was kind of boring.
I'm not sure if I even made and impat. That is my problem. How do I know if I've done what God has told me to do?
Why God, do I do what You tell me to do, but then what?
Why?
I love God and I will always have faith and trust Him, but sometimes, I just don't see where I am or what I'm doing that is right.
God, help me!!
Usually I help to plan the fun activities for the teens. But, this year there was a new team. And being apart of the new team I was given a lesson to teach. However, a few days before I was given the lesson, I was thinking about the theme which was, "The Connection," and God spoke to me about the prodigal son so I began to study the prodigal son. And I came up with a lesson and my two main points were that the reason to stay connected to Christ is to fulfill the purpose of God and to get what God has promised.
So, I had my lesson all planned before our first meeting two weeks ago. We met, got everything together and the week of Vacation Bible School I got sick. I caught the flu. I wasn't sure if I was gonna make it to VBS. As the week went on, I began to feel better, but the night before I was supposed to teach on Friday, I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned all night. I had to take the day off to sleep all day because I was so tired and being sick on top of it all, didn't help.
Well, I got to church and I couldn't print my notes. But, I wasn't going to let it get to me, I just went to another computer. I got all of my notes printed and off to my lesson I went. I think the teaching went well, but I was a little bothered. At the end of the teaching, it was quiet. Too quiet. I almost didn't know what to do. I'm not sure if they even understood everything and at the end, I meant to have them get together and teach their own lesson of what they learned, but I didn't. So, I went to Bible trivia, which was kind of boring.
I'm not sure if I even made and impat. That is my problem. How do I know if I've done what God has told me to do?
Why God, do I do what You tell me to do, but then what?
Why?
I love God and I will always have faith and trust Him, but sometimes, I just don't see where I am or what I'm doing that is right.
God, help me!!
Wednesday, July 9, 2014
When You Feed Your Faith...
Your starve your doubts. You starve your fear.
I have to feed my faith. I have to feed my faith. I have to see my challenges as opportunities. Faith feeds on impossibilities. I see a lot of impossibilities, but i have to see my FAITH as being bigger!!
I have to feed my faith. I have to feed my faith. I have to see my challenges as opportunities. Faith feeds on impossibilities. I see a lot of impossibilities, but i have to see my FAITH as being bigger!!
The Flu Ain't No Joke
I've had the flu once in my life...during H1N1. A student came to class, "Ms. Nelson, I'm not gonna be in class today, I got the flu." WHAT!! "GET OUT," is what I told him. That was on a Friday. On Sunday, I was attacked. Full blown headache, chills, and sweats. It felt like my head was in vice grip. I took my temp and it was 102. I called my mom. She told me to go to the ER. Then she told me to call my doctor. I did and the doctor told me that it was only the flu, take some Tylenol and if the fever didn't go down, call her. I did and the fever went down. For the next week I was miserable. And I still had to work because we were planning an open house for an after school event.
I took Monday off and was back at school on Tuesday. That was 2009.
Yesterday morning I woke up and I was just sneezing and sneezing. My nose was running and it was like allergies had hit me hard. I went to work and as the day was going on, my throat started to get scratchy. I got some Emergen-C and generic Airborne and began my routine doping whenever I feel myself coming down with a cold. It wasn't work. I got home from church and I just tossed and turned all night. I used so much tissue it was a shame. I got up this morning and went to Walgreens to get some NyQuil and I went back to bed. I didn't get up until 2pm.
Now I'm waiting to go home. I was gonna be out...taking some NyQuil and hitting the sheets. Everything hurts, my head, my ear, my body....this flu got me good, but I'm not gonna let it keep me from doing the will of the Lord. I will still deliver the word of God to the teens...
THANK GOD FOR STRENGTH!!
I took Monday off and was back at school on Tuesday. That was 2009.
Yesterday morning I woke up and I was just sneezing and sneezing. My nose was running and it was like allergies had hit me hard. I went to work and as the day was going on, my throat started to get scratchy. I got some Emergen-C and generic Airborne and began my routine doping whenever I feel myself coming down with a cold. It wasn't work. I got home from church and I just tossed and turned all night. I used so much tissue it was a shame. I got up this morning and went to Walgreens to get some NyQuil and I went back to bed. I didn't get up until 2pm.
Now I'm waiting to go home. I was gonna be out...taking some NyQuil and hitting the sheets. Everything hurts, my head, my ear, my body....this flu got me good, but I'm not gonna let it keep me from doing the will of the Lord. I will still deliver the word of God to the teens...
THANK GOD FOR STRENGTH!!
Sunday, July 6, 2014
SPLAT
I am sleepy. I'm not as young as I used to be. I can't stay up so late anymore. I need a FULL 8 and a nice bed. But, this week has been long and I haven't had enough sleep. And my body is suffering. Last night I got in bed and as I was sleeping, well, half sleep...Something fell on my face. SPLAT! When it hit me, it woke me up and swiped it off my face and I rolled over and I felt something moving. So I jumped up an turned the light on. And there was a huge black bug. It had fallen from the ceiling. I think it came out of the vent.
It scared me, but I needed to get rid of it, so I got a container out the trash and captured it and threw it in the garbage.
It bothered me that this bug was in my bed so I tried to pray. But, I was too sleepy.
God, I need a vacation!!
Thursday, July 3, 2014
Tryna Make a Dollar Out of 15 Cents
I don't like that I'm in debt. It means the money is always on my mind. So much so that I'm always trying to find a bargain.
I ordered a mifi so that I can have prepaid internet. I ordered it on Amazon for about $50. When it came in the mail today it didn't have a SIM card so I went to the Verizon store and they put a SIM card in and activated it and I purchased a $15 service plan. The only reason I purchased $15 is because I found out that you could purchase the plan online at Walmart and you don't have to pay tax and shipping if you put the address as Oregon. No taxes in Oregon. So that's what I did. I bought a $60 Walmart gift card, and went online and paid $49.88 for a prepaid card to add to the $15. When I got it home the password would not work. I called Verizon and was on the phone for an hour and it still did not work. I finally contacted the seller to let them know that it didn't work and that I needed to return the item.
This is all because I'm trying to save a buck. If I had money I would just get regular internet like everyone else. But, nnnoooooo. I can't do that because I'm in debt. I have to be concerned about my money.
I can't wait for the millions to start pouring in.....
Thank God!!!
I ordered a mifi so that I can have prepaid internet. I ordered it on Amazon for about $50. When it came in the mail today it didn't have a SIM card so I went to the Verizon store and they put a SIM card in and activated it and I purchased a $15 service plan. The only reason I purchased $15 is because I found out that you could purchase the plan online at Walmart and you don't have to pay tax and shipping if you put the address as Oregon. No taxes in Oregon. So that's what I did. I bought a $60 Walmart gift card, and went online and paid $49.88 for a prepaid card to add to the $15. When I got it home the password would not work. I called Verizon and was on the phone for an hour and it still did not work. I finally contacted the seller to let them know that it didn't work and that I needed to return the item.
This is all because I'm trying to save a buck. If I had money I would just get regular internet like everyone else. But, nnnoooooo. I can't do that because I'm in debt. I have to be concerned about my money.
I can't wait for the millions to start pouring in.....
Thank God!!!
Wednesday, July 2, 2014
Dissapointments
This summer is NOT going well AT ALL!!
We were notified that we got the grant. We had been planning and planning for about 2 months. When we got notice, we were in full planning mode. However, I was hesitant. I kept asking to see the contract. We never receive a contract....
A week later we were told that we DID NOT have the grant. I was calm. It didn't surprise me. My counterpart was befuddled. So she scrambled to get things up and running. I wasn't moving. I was waiting and praying.
Well, we got everything up and running for summer camp, but it was a ROCKY road. I mean we were going back and forth and back and forth. It was BANANAS and it's been three weeks and it's still BANANAS.
Right before summer camp started I wanted to just SHUT EVERYTHING DOWN. But, I didn't say anything. Now, I'm wishing we did because it's just BANANAS. We've already had to deal with attitudes and a worker who is volunteering being talked about. Attitudes with another volunteer staff and I slipped and said something that I shouldn't have said. Nothing major I just did an air ball comment about one of the campers. No I wasn't talking about one of the campers, but she did an air ball and I said air ball. Not very professional.
I also have to confess that I haven't had nice feelings about one of the volunteers. Not that I don't like her, but it is something about her that I have never been quite comfortable with, so I've kind of kept her at arms length and now things are getting bad because she's feeling the disconnection with not just me, but others who are here because of some of the things she's said about people.
I NEED God to help me!!! HELP ME, PLEASE!!!
I want a clean heart. I want a pure heart. There are somethings that I just don' t want to know because I WANT a clean heart!!
God, I don't want evil in my heart!!!
God help me!!!
We were notified that we got the grant. We had been planning and planning for about 2 months. When we got notice, we were in full planning mode. However, I was hesitant. I kept asking to see the contract. We never receive a contract....
A week later we were told that we DID NOT have the grant. I was calm. It didn't surprise me. My counterpart was befuddled. So she scrambled to get things up and running. I wasn't moving. I was waiting and praying.
Well, we got everything up and running for summer camp, but it was a ROCKY road. I mean we were going back and forth and back and forth. It was BANANAS and it's been three weeks and it's still BANANAS.
Right before summer camp started I wanted to just SHUT EVERYTHING DOWN. But, I didn't say anything. Now, I'm wishing we did because it's just BANANAS. We've already had to deal with attitudes and a worker who is volunteering being talked about. Attitudes with another volunteer staff and I slipped and said something that I shouldn't have said. Nothing major I just did an air ball comment about one of the campers. No I wasn't talking about one of the campers, but she did an air ball and I said air ball. Not very professional.
I also have to confess that I haven't had nice feelings about one of the volunteers. Not that I don't like her, but it is something about her that I have never been quite comfortable with, so I've kind of kept her at arms length and now things are getting bad because she's feeling the disconnection with not just me, but others who are here because of some of the things she's said about people.
I NEED God to help me!!! HELP ME, PLEASE!!!
I want a clean heart. I want a pure heart. There are somethings that I just don' t want to know because I WANT a clean heart!!
God, I don't want evil in my heart!!!
God help me!!!
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