Who is Your Baby Daddy?

OOOOHHHHH GGGOOOOODDDDDD!!!! I LOVE GOD!!

I had a dream last night and it was CRAZY. I mean, it was God showing me me, and I thank Him for it.

In the dream, I kept telling someone I was pregnant and I was about to give birth. So the person was there waiting on me to give birth. I'm not sure if they were there to try to help me or not, but they were sitting there waiting to see if I would give birth. The problem is, I WASN'T PREGNANT. AT ALL. I just kept telling them that I was. So, I was pretending to be pregnant. I was poking my stomach out and going through the motions like I was pregnant, but I wasn't. I knew I wasn't. I WANTED TO BE, but I wasn't. So, I had a boyfriend, but my boyfriend was the MOST UNLIKELY person. It was one of my former students and he was going along with me being pregnant. He was going through the motions too. We even had sex a couple of times (while the person was right there watching) to show the person that I was indeed pregnant.

WHAT??? I know, crazy, right??

But, each time we had sex, there was no seed being planted. I woke up and started praying asking God, what was going on? What was this dream all about. Basically, the Holy Spirit was showing me that I am barren. I want to be pregnant. I want to be fruitful and multiply. I've got the name picked out, all the baby clothes and even a boyfriend (not the right one), but the seed is not planted on the inside of me. The seed is trying to be planted, but it's won't stay. It keeps getting washed out.

WOW!! Barrenness produces NO FRUIT. A tree that bears no fruit is useless. A woman, in the Bible, who could not produce fruit was said to be cursed. As a matter of fact, Jesus cursed the fig tree who could not produce any fruit.

GGGGOOOOODDDDDDD. OH GOOOOODDDDDDDDD!!!!!

I want to produce fruit. I want to carry a seed and be fruitful and multiply. I have to bear much fruit. I was wondering what the significance of my boyfriend as my former student was. This is the last person I would date and want to be with. The Holy Spirit was showing me that I am trying to produce fruit the wrong way. Dating and having sex with a former student is perverse. I know he is of age now, but he is still not someone who is capable of caring for a baby. If I'm not mistaken he's like 22 or 23, but at that age, he has nothing--no job (I think he just graduated from college), no place to live, and no means of being a father who can care for MY child the way that it needs to be cared for. So, I can't get a seed from him. I have to get my seed the right way...the God way--through the spirit. I need the fruit of the spirit to be planted on the inside of my so that it can grow and I can produce much fruit.

OMG!!! Thank God!!!!!!! for His Holy Spirit and divine revelation!!

FAILURE: The Lack of Trying

Failure is not the absence of success. Failure is the lack of trying.--Eld Michael Scherer. I have GOT to try. If I don't try I am a failure. If I try and not succeed, I'll just have to try again. My goals for 2014... I would like to help the non-profit that I work for to become successful this year. That is my goal. I do not want to do anything with my business until this business is successful. 1.

You Make Me Happy

I received an email from my econ instructor. He basically said to me that it is best that I withdraw from he class because my grade is currently a 54%.  I simply replied that I would not withdraw and that I would finish the course. He then responded and said that it is in the syllabus that he has the authority to withdraw a student if he feels that student is so far behind.

I took offense to that and it bothered me so much. My spirit was bothered. I didn't know what to say so I didn't respond. I tried to go to sleep, but I couldn't. I tried to eat, but I couldn't.

I went to church and during prayer it came to me....

I am a consumer. I paid for the class, so I have the RIGHT to finish. Whether I finish with and A or an F, I have the right to finish and unless I'm not participating, I can finish. So, instead of allowing him to bully me I simply emailed me that I would be finishing the class and the only person who will withdraw me is me.  I asked him that if there is further discussion that need to take place, we could invite the dean, vp, and the business office.

I THANK GOD for the HOLY SPIRIT!!

I'm not sure how he will respond. but I will not be bullied.

I Gotta Do Something Right

I LOVE GOD!!!!

And I want to do His will more than anything in the world. But, sometimes, it's like I can't do anything right when it comes to following Him.

God spoke something to me back in September and I went about following His word, but I was a little slack and slowful and I didn't really know what to do, so I just stopped. I did what I could do, then I stopped because I didn't know what else to do.  I know the Bible says that faith without works is dead and I had faith and I did the work the I knew to do, but when I didn't know what else to do I stopped and said to myself that I would finish it at another time. Well, someone else came along and got the benefits of what I was supposed to be doing.  OMG!!!

So, I panicked and decided to just put together something which was probably not the right thing to do, but God, I don't understand.????

Why can't I do anything the right way. I was standing on your word. I did what I thought was the right thing to do, it was approved for me to do it and then when I went to finish I didn't have the information to finish so I just stopped. I didn't get any instructions from the Holy Spirit, so I didn't do anything and someone else just came on it and got what I thought we were supposed to get.  Why, God, why??? What is going on???

Torment

The thorn in my flesh is at it again. Grrrrrrr....

Entrepreneurship

A few years ago (I think in 2011) God was giving me an idea for a business. I hadn't had it all planned out, but I knew that I was going to be helping businesses. I kept saying that it was going to be research and development, but I knew that wasn't quite the right phrase, but the concept was right.

In about February 2012 I was prophesied to that I would be helping organizations and business become established.

This was simply confirmation as to what God was putting in my spirit.

On Friday, I was a little down....

My purpose in life is to please God and I know that spiritually that is what I'm going to do. But, I"m also going to be a light for Christ in the marketplace. So, I was just asking God for vision for my life.

I was told by my mentor that vision guides you...it's the guiding light...it helps to keep the focus. So, I was asking God, where was I going to be at age 50 and age 70?  I needed to have a vision to help guide me.

I began imaging myself (and my husband) working together on a business that is kind of the opposite of what I'm doing now.  I really don't want to go into details because I'm not sure how it will work, but that was my vision.

The Bible talks about when Joseph had a dream, he had the dream twice and when Pharoah had a dream, he had the dream twice.  Well, that came to me twice and it was prophesied to me so it is established by God and I thank Him for it.

But, on the journey to the dream coming to past I'm experiencing some trials.

My economics class is very difficult and I have a teacher who is not very helpful. Actually, he is trying to kick me out the class because I failed the test.  I have a tutor who is great, but she doesn't have enough time to meet with me. I need someone who can spend time teaching me the information. I NEED a teacher. I am paying the community college $500 for notes and a powerpoint.  The teacher is NOT teaching me anything. I've learned more on youtube and khan academy than I've learned from the teacher.

So, I'm going through that trial right now and it's difficult. I know God will get me through because I've helped plenty of students and I have to reap what I've sown. So, I thank God for passing this class!!!

And I thank God for my vision!!!

Oh Boy....Bed Bugs

My downstairs neighbor called me on Friday. She said that her case manager came to pick up all her clothes and sheets and she needed to get ahold of her so that she could drop them off. I called my boss. Told her. My boss called me back and said that her clothes would not be ready until tomorrow. I told my neighbor.

My boss called me Saturday morning at 8:30am to tell me to relay the message to my downstairs neighbor that her clothes were ready and she needed to pick them up at the laundromat. She then said that she needs to keep them in plastic bags for two weeks. HUH???

I relayed the message and since my neighbor didn't have a ride to the laundromat, I offered. But, I told her I didn't understand or fully remember what she said about the plastic bags, so we would go in to ask. My neighbor protested and said that she read the paper and it gave instructions about when they were going to be spraying her apartment.

WHAT??

We already have Orkin coming spray once a month. What does she need extra bug treatment for. I didn't want to pry and it was early in the morning, so I just left it alone.  But, my "spidey senses" were tweaking. Does she have bed bugs?  I mean, I remember my ordeal with them and it was the most horrendous experience. And I DO NOT want to go through that again. Bed bugs travel. So does that mean that everyone will need to be treated?  That's exactly what that means. These critters do not go away without a fight. OMG, I hope that it's not bed bugs. I hope and pray that it's not bed bugs!!

I can't take bed bugs. I've got too much stuff. No, I do not have a bed (YET), but my sofa and my chairs. Those critters can hide anywhere.

Lord, I pray that it's not bed bugs. I'm going to clean up right now!!!