GOD IS AWESOME

So, today is my birthday and at first I wasn't too happy about it. Well, I was grateful that God woke me up and I was happy to see another year, but to look at myself and my life--I wasn't very happy. I told myself around this time last year, "I will not be in this situation, this time next year." And sure enough, look at where I am (was). I was in despair, despondent, depressed and oppressed mentally and emotionally. I allowed myself to do a 360 degree turn that ended me in the same mentality that I was in last year and because of that, I felt pathetic. However, GOD in HIS awesomeness made a way for me to pick myself up (with the help of others). I went to dinner with one of my mentors and she just laid it out plain to me, she said the same thing that my spiritual mom said to me--I have got to let go of my past--all the hurt, pain, shame, and unforgiveness. I've got to let it go. I can not move forward in my life because I'm stuck being the person who have done wrong and I feel I should be punished, so I punish myself emotionally by being negative about myself. I have not used the word of God to get past my past. My mentor told me to write a letter to myself telling myself that I forgive me. And then she told me to burn it symbolizing that it's over. Once it's burned, I can't put the ashed back together. That's something I'm gonna do. She also told me that I need to write a resume to Jesus. This resume would highlight my best qualities as it related to getting into the kingdom. I'm gonna do that.

She made a good analogy about how I've gone through school and now is getting ready to work on my Ph.D, but in the spirit, I'm still in kindergarten. I have not gotten out of kindergarten spiritually. Well, it's time for me to grow up and grow in the grace of God. He has forgiven me and He has given me His grace--it's sufficient for me, so I can love myself, forgive myself and be the woman of God that I'm supposed to be.

I THANK GOD for my mentors and my spiritual mom!!! Without them, I will still be stuck. So, on this day I commemorate my new life in Christ!! Today is my birthday and I've have been born again in Christ--Old things are past away and all things have become new. I am a new creature in Christ Jesus. Through Christ I can do all things. Everything that God made is GOOD and He made me, so He made a GOOD THING!!! THANK GOD.