Who You Fornicating With

I met Mr. Upgrade he had me all hot and bothered. I mean I was actually getting ready to be really irresponsible.

We have midnight prayer the 1st Saturday of every month. And because I'm on the multimedia team we have make sure the prayer service is set up. I was scheduled to be there at at 1am to make sure everything was running well.

However, I was gonna cancel because I wanted to spend time with Mr. Upgrade. but I got a call from boss man, "Hey sis, I gotta work out of town, you got it tonight?"

All I could say was, "Sure."

Dang it....

I told boss man on Sunday that I was gonna be irresponsible and text him at 10pm and cancel. He laughed. "Who you fornicating with? You not the irresponsible type......," is what he said to me.

I just laughed. His wife was a little embarrassed that he was asking me that.

God, thanks for being mindful of me!!

Am I Being Hustled

I have a profile on POF and one evening I got a message from a guy saying that he liked my picture. We exchanged numbers. He said he was from Tennesee, but moved to live in St. Louis. He called me at 5am.

WHAT?

I was working in Peru, IL so I was staying in the hotel. He said he had just finished working out with his personal trainer. and he said that his sister lost 50lbs and was now a size 6. He also said that I should try his trainer and that he'd pay for a session. So he gave me the number. He was fast talking and YES I DO need to lose weight and this may just be the motivation to get my fat butt moving. So I called the trainer and we did a session (despite me not having the right shoes). I did about 120 squats. WHY oh WHY did I do that?

At the end the of session he wanted me to sign up for his services for about $300 a month and he would give me one month free. I told him I didn't want to pay for it all upfront. I would like to pay for things on a month to month basis because my schedule changes. He tried to convince me by saying I wasn't motivated because a motivated person would sign up and just do it.

WHAT??

I don't know who you are, I just met you and how do I know that you are not gonna just take my money?  We hung up and I called the other guy back.

This was all kind of crazy. I mean I thought this guy was interested in a date or something. Then I realized that the trainer and this guy had the same area codes.

WHAT IS GOING ON?

Is this the new hustle?  Meet someone on a dating site for your business?

I mean I could do the exact same thing.....

As a matter of fact I need to find a man who can help me remodel my house.....

Cryfest:Detroit

There's a lot going on in the world as it relates to racism. It's absolutely depressing. I mean sometimes I'm in tears thinking about and hearing what's going on. It messes with your psyche...being a black person, to know that something as simple as skin color will cause so much hate. 

I went to see the movie Detroit and as I was sitting there (there were only 7 people in the theatre) I kept asking myself what I was doing there. "Why am I watching is movie?" I mean I can watch the news and see this exact same thing. I stayed until the end and I was horrified. I mean absolutely HORRIFIED.  But, God is good and I know some people are so angry that they dismiss God in some situations. Yes, slavery happened, yes lynching and separate, but equal happened, but we can never leave God out. We CAN'T. In the Bible God told Abraham that his decedents would be held captive in slavery for 400 years, but in the end he was gonna bring them out with a MIGHTY deliverance.  

As I sat and watch the ending of the movie I just cried because the young musician could not go back to his old life. But he turned to the grace and love of God. He had nobody to get him through that hell but God and sometimes I think about my life and the abuse that I've been in and I often ask God why and I dismiss God and I turn my back on him because of the struggle that I go through, but no matter what God had NEVER left me and I Thank God for it!!

Thank You Jesus for your love and grace!!

White Castle Made Me Pee My Pants

I don't like living by myself. I always have this fear that something is gonna happen to me and no one will find me for days and days.....

I was eating White Castle sliders. I didn't realize that they put hot pepper cheese on the sandwich and the vapor from the heat made me inhale the wrong way and I ended up in the coughing fit. I couldn't catch my breath. I was coughing so hard and so much that I pee'd my pants.

OMG

White Castle, when I order regular cheese sliders I just want regular cheese, NOT hot cheese.

What Customer Service

Has customer service gone the way of the rotary phone? I mean you see them every now and then, but they are not being used often. LOL.

I was paying for a paint night and I was looking over the website to see if I could bring my own food. I couldn't find the information so I send a message over FB to ask about it. The message she sends me was rude..."You can find the information on the website, but yes can you bring food. " Thanks, dang. I didn't want to shoot back at her and tell her that I looked, because I did really look. I just couldn't find the information. I mean, maybe your website is just jacked up and if I can't find the information then it might need to be moved. Just answer the question as nicely as I asked. WOW.

Another instance of poor customer service. I guess I understand this one, but it could have been handled better...

I rent tons of cars through AVIS rental car. Like every month and sometimes 2 or 3 times a month. The same lady that I rent from works the counter every time. Sometimes I schedule a pick up at 8 am when the counter opens and she's not there. I prepay online and I have a premium card that is supposed to allow me to just grab the keys and go. So why do I always have to wait when I reserve at 8am? It's happened at least 3 out of 4 times.  Because I've been renting cars every month for the past 3 years I would say that I"m a loyal customer. So why am I not treated like that? I guess this is where my "privilege" mentality is coming it at, but without loyal customers some businesses will fail. So I spend money in exchange for good customer services.  Well, the last straw was when I pick up the keys to a vehicle, but I didn't necessarily pick up the vehicle because I didn't have the time. However, upon picking up the keys at 9pm, there were two services lights on in the car. I was supposed to drove to St. Louis to get to a concert at 11pm. WHAT am I supposed to do with bells and alarms going off in the car. Luckily I cancelled going to the concert, so I just drove the car home and took it back the next day. WHY OH WHY was I charged for gas? WHAT? I drove 12 miles and the was still on full. I called an argued with the lady and told her that I should not be charged because I could not even drive the car. She tried to say that all I had to do was call the roadside assistance. WHAT? Why would I even do that and be late to where I"m going? I guess if I had time I would do that, but I had no time for that. So I just didn't go. I paid for a useless car as least give me the benefit of the doubt and not charge me for gas. DANG. She finally relented and said she would waive the charges this time.

WOW...I haven't been back to AVIS rental car.

I Almost Burned My House Down

I was some cleaning in my house--folding laundry, vacuuming, etc all while listening to music. I decided to light some scented oil...my favorite scented oil while cleaning. And clean I did....until I turned around and fire was shooting up towards the ceiling from my scented oil. I jumped into action and ran towards the mantel, moving frantically. I grabbed the oil lamp and tried to move it to the sink. Fire was falling on the floor...OMG, I was frantic. I finally got it to the sink and snuffed out the fire with the water.

Whew.....

I can't believe that I just almost burned down my house. There have been times when I've left the oil lamp burning when I've left the house. Thank God I didn't leave. Basically, the top of the oil lamp was cracked and the oil seeped through to the candle. Yep, that one is in the trash.

God, what am I doing with this house? Help me!!

I Just Broke Up With a Man I Love

"This is my confidence, you've never failed me yet...." (Do It Again-Elevation Worship)

I met this guy on POF....Let's call him Mr. Ohio. Went went to tacos at Applebees on July 30. I was actually gonna travel to go see him, but I was so tired that he came to Decatur. He looked different from his pics, but he was still attractive. After I left, I text him that I liked him. Not sure why and I was trying and trying to figure it out. Well anyway. we talked on the phone and made plans to hang out over the weekend. I was gonna see him on my way to Ohio, but he convinced me to come see him before and we had a wonderful time. Yes, we did the do and it was sweet. He made me a full breakfast and we made dinner together. As we were talking and getting to know each other, he revealed that he had a vasectomy.

Oh boy....not good. Especially since the night before, he said to me (while trying to convince me to have sex with him) "don't you wanna get pregnant?"  What??? Why would you say that to me? Of course I wanna get pregnant!!!! But, that's not why we gonna have sex. OMG.

So, when he said that, I was kind of baffled....like why in the world would he say that if it was not just a ploy to have sex.

Anyway, times goes on and I'm thinking about him and I can't get him off my mind. But, I don't know why. I mean, he's not all that. I kept wondering if I was desperate. I mean, I am 40. God help me. On Friday we hung out again. I was thoroughly exhausted, but I wanted to see him. So I packed up and drove to see him. We had a nice night watching movies. Then off to bed where I refused to have sex with him, but gave in because I was so turned of.

Why did I do that?

He flipped the script and had me singing......

I don't think anyone has made me sing before?!

The next morning I was saying to him that I couldn't be with him and that he was gonna break my heart. Well, he agreed that he was a heart breaker and I told him I believe him. I mean, why say it if you don't mean it. I mean, you did say the thing about pregnancy when you know good and well, you can't reproduce. So I made it up in my mind that I wouldn't see him again.

I need a man who needs me and he doesn't need me. I mean, he's been married. His ex-wife has 3 children and he still looks at them as his children. What do you want me for? And he's spoiled. He thinks he can get everything he wants.

So, when he called me today I just told him that I thought we wanted two different things and that I don't think it would work out between us. He didn't do much to convince me otherwise. so I broke up with him.

And now my heart is hurt because I was really into him. I mean, he is the guy that I want to love. My dad says to marry up and he's up. I mean...he's way up there and he would upgrade me and I would want to meet his standards, but I don't right now which makes me so insecure. I mean...I am a wreck right now and if I showed him who I was, he wouldn't want me anyway, so it's better this way.

OMG....God help me, please!!!