She Gone Again

I was so stressed at the beginning of the month. There was a lot going on. Then I got sick and I'm still at the tail end of this cold and Aunt Flo must be tired, cause she is no where in sight. I was anticipating her monthly return and all the signs and symptoms were there: crampy, achy, boobs heavy and sore. But it will be September in a few days and she's usually here by now. I guess I'm not complaining. I've been having trouble with my soft cup the last few months. It hasn't been very easy to remove and a few times I've ended up squirting blood everywhere. NOT PRETTY!!

I can say that I have gotten my rest and I've been rejuvenated. My spiritual mom called me the other day and she gave me some words of wisdom and I am SO GRATEFUL because I felt like I was dying and I needed to be revived.

Basically, I told her that I haven't felt motivated to do anything...I just wanted to lay in the bed and watch TV forever. Some days I didn't even want to get up and shower. She let me know that I have no motivation and passion because I'm not doing the will of the Father. I'm fatigued and weary and the only way I'll get my motivation back is when I'm fulfilling my purpose. She reminded me of what God was just telling me a few days ago....

A few days ago, I was just thinking about myself and my purpose and how there are so many women who have experienced abuse and it had cause them to be fragmented in their life. They aren't whole and the heart break causes them to live sub par and unhappy. God was reminding me that my purpose is to help them to see the God who heals ALL hurts. And this is what my spiritual mother reminded me of. I've been dwelling so much on my failures that it was sucking the life out of me. When I mess up, it plagued me so that it was like a cloak of failure that I was wearing. It got so that I didn't want to acknowledge the spiritual part of me. I put that part of me on the shelf. But, the problem with that is, that's the real me. Who I am spiritually is who I am. So I can't separate that part of me. So, I am grateful for the revival in my life!!