Why Am I So Nice

So Mr Ohio hasn't left me alone. I keep trying to get away from him. How many times have I found myself in this situation?

The only reason I like him is because of his character, but that's also why I don't like him. But when he calls me I talk to him. It was funny the Golfer called me one time and asked me why a lady he talked to a year ago all of a sudden has called him. I told him, "She's trying to keep hope alive."

That's the way I feel with Mr Ohio. I talk to him because deep down I have this hope that he likes me enough to want to be with me.

Speaking of the Golfer. He stopped talking to me.  He started dating Maria. He didn't want to go on a date with her and he joked about me meeting him at the coffee shop to go meet her. We laughed about it. Apparently it was a good date because they went to a movie and then to Hooters to round out the night. They shut the restaurant down.  Since then he has been out with her and she has visited him abt his house.

Now the sexting has begun.

He forwarded me a video of a half naked video she sent him and then he recorded himself half naked and sent it to her. He showed me that video too. We chatted about it. I can say it was a little awkward at and not because I was jealous--I was truly happy for him and I knew that he was going to start dating her. I just knew it, but what made it awkward was the fact that he was a guy and I'm a girl. If this was a girl friend forwarding me a video from a guy half naked, I would have commented on the guy and how he looked. Something like, "Ooooooohhhh girl, he is HOT." And then I would we would have talked about her sleeping with him. But this was a guy sending me a vid of a half naked girl. Yea she was cute, but not in a, "she's hot, I wish I was getting with her," type of thing. I mean, how do you comment on a half naked girl if you aren't into girls.

So I asked an awkward question, "Are you gonna sleep with her?" Which is what I would have asked a girl friend in this situation, but it would have been in a giddy way, not in an awkward, "soooo aaareee you.....gonna sleeeeeppp with her?"

We muddled through the situation like we always do.

After that we talked the next day and then nothing. I texted him 4 times over the next 10 days and got nothing.

I miss my friend.

I know he was only friends with me because he wanted me, but I didn't have the capacity for more. I enjoyed our time and I loved the fact that I could talk to him about anything. I mean anything. I mean who beside him knows that I've been a prostitute and still was friends with me? He didn't judge. He just listened.

I miss that.