Whores and Nuns

Everytime my friend Sara calls me I get tickled because she calls me Sis Kay and to me it sounds like she's calling me a nun like Sis Mary. I get a kick out of it and I've even told myself that I should become a nun because I'm single, I don't date, I don't have sex and most importantly I love God and want to do and will. I want to help other people find their purpose, do the will of the Father....

This is such a contrast of where I've come from. I can truly say that I have totally changed. Christ has changed me. My MIND is CHANGED. My HEART is CHANGED. My AFFECTIONS have CHANGED.

I am brand new!!!

I used to be a whore.....

Yep, I became sexually active at a young age and it caused me to become promiscuous. Over the years I've kept a list and it's pretty pathethic, but God changed me. I was tired of myself. I was tired of futile relationships. I was tired of being used and misused. I was tired of the emptiness. I wanted loved, I wanted a sense of belonging. I wanted more than empty loneliness. Even when I did fall in love with a guy, he was so different from me. He was such the opposite and I was still lonely, empty. I wanted true love. I still want true passion and I'm working on a passionate relationship with God.

So, I was really bothered when I heard this song on the radio. I'm not even sure who sang it (it was actually a rapper) and he was talking about being born gay and how a person can't change. It saddened me because I am living proof that YOU CAN CHANGE.

Well, you may say that being promiscuous is not the same thing as being gay. Well, I beg to differ. I wasn't just promiscuous....I experienced molestation as a child which caused ************* (I'm too embarrassed to say the rest). And this was when I was a little girl, so I didn't know any better. I had no choice in the matter. Just like a homosexual says they have no control over their affections--they were born that way, I had no control over my body at that young an age. But, it led me to live a diabolical life....I've prostituted myself, I've slept with men, I didn't know what their names were, I met men on the internet and drove hundreds of miles to sleep with them...It was bad and VERY dangerous. God kept me covered!!!!!!

GOD KEPT ME COVERED!!!!!

There are women who have come up murdered meeting men they didn't know. There are women who have contracted HIV being promiscuous. BUT GOD!!!!!!!

HE COVERED ME!!!!!

So, don't let anyone tell you, you can't change. I don't care if they are a celebrity and they are going to be a spokesperson for gay rights. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE GAY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE!!!!

I didn't want to be a whore!!! I just didn't know how to govern my body. I didn't know how to handle temptation. Did I like sex?  YES, I didn't just like it, I LOVED IT!!!!! I HAD GOOD SEX TOO!!! BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO BE THAT WAY. Actually, I did, but I got tired of the emptiness and I God gave me a sense of mind to want to change and I DID!!

I couldn't do it myself. GOD DID THIS!!!!

HE CHANGED ME, BUT I HAD A HEART TO CHANGE!!!!

I went from being a whore, to now I feel like a nun!!!! And I'm not made about it either!!!!