Excuse Me, What Kind of Hairstyle is That?

I don't get "hit on" very often. It makes me wonder, "Am I unattractive? Am I fat or Am I just too old?" I don't let it bother me, but it's nice for someone to notice me and I'm not talking about some old, bald dude with missing teeth. I'm talking about someone my age.

So, imagine my surprise when a guy asked me, "Excuse me, what kind of hairstyle is that?"

"Huh," was my response as I tried to come up with words to explain my hairstyle. He then went on to tell me that he was flirting.

"Oh, Ok," was all I managed to say. I mean, I was at the laundromat, sweaty from being out in the sun at the run/walk, and I have a small cold sore on my lip. I wasn't feeling quite attractive or flirty, but I accepted it. I didn't say anything else to him and he left.

I started thinking about a conversation Mister and I had about meeting people. He was disappointed that he has not been able to meet anyone that he wants to me. He mentioned that his prospects are at gas stations or laundromats (meaning the women at laundromats and gas stations are not the type of women he likes to meet). I told him, I always go to the gas station and laundromat. I kind of laughed because I understand.
The last guy that hit on me at the gas station was half drunk and the last guy that hit on my at the laundromat was almost 50 and involved with another woman. Then there was the guy that said he liked me, but he didn't want to date a black girl. LOL. He wasn't saying it in a racist way, he was half black. What I got from him saying it was that he dated some black girls in the past who weren't "his cup of tea." I understand. There are a lot of hood chicks out there and quite a few go to the laundromat. LOL.

Anyway....

This guy was cute. He had his son with him. When he came back, he finally got up enough nerve to talk to me. We exchanged numbers. He's from D.C. (my fav place to visit). I'm not sure what I think about him. I asked him how many children he had. He said he had 6.

Oh boy.....


Here we go again....


LOL.....

Why do I meet men with so many children. I want a man that can pay a lot of attention to me. When you have more than 2 children, you attention is spread thin, in addition to your money.

I then asked, "Married, divorces, or single," to which he replied, "Single."

Oh boy....


So that means baby mamas.

He explained that he was in a relationship for 10 years and he has 5 children by the woman. WOW.

10 years is a lot to compete with. And he said that he moved here, all the way to central IL because of this woman. WOW!!!

Not, sure what I'm going to do with this. Maybe I'll just go out a few times, just to have a little fun. But, I tend to think that if you have been in an extensive relationship for a long time, you NEED to take some time for you. You don't NEED to jump right into the next relationship. I mean, how do you know who you are apart from the relationship. When people have been together for that long, and I'm assuming they lived together, they "JOIN" together as one. And when they break up it's like part of them is missing and they need to get or fill that part back up with themselves. When Mister left I went a little crazy with the men and it was making me so crazy that I just needed to STOP. I took time for me. Almost 3 years without a date and there have been times where I've been just happy to be by myself because I needed to know who I was apart from him. My life was so intertwined with him that I didn't know who I was or what I liked. I NEEDED that time and space.

I know, I know....everyone is different.

But, 10 years being attached to someone.

And you didn't marry the person. Why not get married? But you kept having children.

Something is wrong with that picture.  I"m not judging it, but I'm cautious.....

Stop It

I had a dream last night and it was pretty interesting.

I'm not sure where we were, but my first lady was there. She was ministering and prophesying to people. For some reason I was laying down on a mattress on the floor underneath the covers. Coach was there with me, but I couldn't get comfortable because it was cold and I was trying to stay covered. I was also wondering if she was going to come minister to me, especially since I was laying in a bed with a man who was not my husband. Eventually she came over, snatched the covers off and said, "What do we have here?" She then looked at me and told me to stick my tongue out. She examined my tongue and mouth and said, "You have black lungs." I said, "I don't smoke." She looked at coach and said, "Maybe it's all the sex. STOP IT," and then she left.  I woke up shortly and wondered what it meant.

WOW!!

I've Purchased 3 Vehicles

I was able to pay the balance of my car note today. And I have the title in my hand. Thank you God, this burden has been lifted. Now I just need to get this car fixed. I want to get rid of it, but I can't afford a new one right now. So, I'm going to concentrate on fixing it. This will be the 3rd car that I've purchased and paid off. The 2 prior had been paid on on time, but I was behind 5 months. I thank God that this was a small community credit union. And the banker allowed me to be late without repo'ing my car or sending me to court. Thank God!!

Craziest Dreams

The last two days I've had the craziest, disturbing dreams. The first dream, I was with Mister and we were having sex, but for some reason I had a really hairy booty and the smell was awful. I mean, it smelled like I hadn't washed in days. It was the grossest thing. Not only was my butt extremely hairy, but I had ingrown hairs that has turned into big bumps with puss oozing out. It was the grossest thing.  Why in the world would I have a dream like that. The smell was so bad, I thought it was real. I had to check myself. LOL

Then last night I had a dream that I was kidnapped by this girl that I know and her sister and I think Mister left me or something like that. I tried to call 911, but they turned off the phones and they were laughing at me because I was trying to escape. I started pleading the blood of Jesus and the one girl just looked at me. Then they got out the smallest pocket knives to cut me and I was wrestling with them to get the knives away from them. The knives were so small I kept wondering if they were trying to kill me or just torture me because they could not do any damage with those knives. Somehow I escaped. But, Mister was in this dream too and I kept wondering why he left me.

Interesting!!!

For Where I'm going....Why I'm not Married

I've prayed (very seldomly) to get married. I thought it would happen last year, but it didn't. And I think I know why.

I'm in transition.

Well, I have been in transition and is coming out. I have transformed from being one person into being a new person and I think God. My mind is being renewed and I am becoming a new creature in Christ. Had I gotten married last year of the years prior, it would have been a mistake. I would have married someone who fit the old me, not the new me.

Mister told me something that was simple, yet powerful and even though he was specifically talking about the two of us, it was a warning so to speak. He said, "we have grown in very different ways" and that is so true in life. People get together and somethings the marriage or relationship doesn't work out because they grow apart instead of together. Had I gotten married we would have grown apart. I would have been in one place and he would have been in another place. That's the same thing with Coach. We are in two totally different hemisperes and when two people are that far apart, there great difficulties getting along.

So, because of my transformation, I need to attract someone who is for me, who will compliment my future. I'm not the old me and I'm still not where I want to be so the new person has to be in an advanced state, not behind me, so to speak. If he is going to be the head, he has to be ahead of me. WOW!!

There have been so many guys that I've dated that has not been "my head." We either had power struggles because I was the head (or trying to be) or he was content to let me lead which is out of order.

So, this year, I will meet the man who is my head.

Thank God for my head!!

My New Treadmill

I'm so exited. I have a new treadmill. Actually, it's not new, I got it on craiglist for $75 and I paid $45 for a guy to move it. It's a proform foldable treadmill. It's nice and sturdy. I cleaned it up because it was in a person's garage. I'm going to get some lubricant and I'm going to dust it out. I'm also going to build a desk to go over the top of it when I get paid. I can't wait. I got on it this morning and did some work, emailing, and I enjoyed it. I also signed up for a weight loss study at Stanford University, but I think I can't enroll because I don't live in Cali and the study says that I have to meet with them once a week which I can't do. I wish I could because I enjoy research and I want to lose some weight.

It's On It's Way

I can feel it. What God has for me is on it's way. I can see it. It's on it's way!! Praise God!!!! AND I'M READY!!!!

I just have to be patient and not get ahead of God!!